Ok this is silly

What Shamu Taught Me About a Happy Marriage - New York Times:

"I love my husband. He's well read, adventurous and does a hysterical rendition of a northern Vermont accent [jewish grandmother accent] that still cracks me up after 12 [6] years of marriage. But he also tends to be forgetful [me!], and is often tardy and mercurial. He hovers around me in the kitchen asking if I read this or that piece in The New Yorker [aaah! me again!] when I'm trying to concentrate on the simmering pans. He leaves wadded tissues [scott!] in his wake. He suffers from serious bouts of spousal deafness [both of us] but never fails to hear me when I mutter to myself on the other side of the house. 'What did you say?' he'll shout.These minor annoyances are not the stuff of separation and divorce, but in sum they began to dull my love for Scott [aaah! his name is scott!]. I wanted – needed – to nudge him a little closer to perfect, to make him into a mate who might annoy me a little less, who wouldn't keep me waiting at restaurants, a mate who would be easier to love."